June 27, 2019 – Sexy nurses, firefighters, schoolgirls… why is role-playing so hot to some people, but not for everyone? A clinical psychologist and an intimacy coach explained to Elite Daily what kind of person tends to be most inclined toward role play scenarios, and what needs role playing can help fulfill. So, if you are curious about why some people are really into role-playing while others are not, here is what they said:
1. Role play allows you to escape from reality
Role-play is really just an opportunity to escape our own reality. Labeling it so gives you permission to act in ways dramatically different from your own real self. Whether or not you will enjoy role playing depends on your own comfort level and how comfortable you are with stepping outside of your norm, and how comfortable you are with your sexual partner.
If you think your sex partner will be supportive and engage with you in role playing, then you’ll have opportunities for intimacy that you wouldn’t normally experience. But if you’re afraid, or if you think your partner wouldn’t fully be into it, then role playing can become stressful and a sexual turn-off.
2. Role play can get you out of your comfort zone
Generally, more risk seeking types of people with a strong sense of self-esteem, and people who are less sexually inhibited are more likely to be drawn towards role-playing. People with experience transforming themselves into other characters – actors, performers, athletes, singers, are usually more turned on by role playing.
3. Role play can fulfill your needs and desires
The most popular roles to play usually fall into two types – people in power positions (like police officers), or more inhibited characters (librarians). By giving the authority in role play to the more innocent roles, you can create stronger fantasies. Regardless of how shy or outspoken you are in real life, you can experiment with both submissive and dominant characters through role-playing. Sexually fulfilling role-playing could all just come down to doing what’s missing in your life, or what you are craving.
4. Role play can still be intimate
As long as both partners embrace role-play, it can be a powerful tool to enhance long term, committed relationships. So before beginning a new sex play adventure, talk to your partner so you can both agree to test out a specific fantasy. Because while you may be comfortable with trying a new scenario, your partner might not be. Don’t force it, otherwise you run the risk making it an anxious or very negative experience.
The experts say, find a starting point where both of you are reasonably comfortable. Sharing the experience of pretending to be somebody else can bring you closer together. As your experience together gets more enjoyable, the roles can expand. Experts also agree it’s a “huge turn-on” when both you and your partner are super into what’s happening.
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